BeFunnyNow.com – Page 870

Q: What did the snowman and his wife put over

Q: What did the snowman and his wife put over their baby’s crib? A: A snowmobile!

A family was having dinner on

A family was having dinner on Mother’s Day. For some reason the mother was unusually quiet. Finally the husband asked what was wrong. “Nothing,” said the woman. Not buying it, he asked again. “Seriously, what’s wrong?” “Do you really want to know? Well, I’ll tell you. I have cooked and cleaned and fed the kids for 15 years and on Mother’s Day, you don’t even tell me so much as “Thank you.” “Why should I?” he said. “Not once in 15 years have I gotten a Father’s Day gift.” “Yes,” she said, “but I’m their real mother.”

Q: Why can’t Chinese Barbecue?

Q: Why can’t Chinese Barbecue? A: Because the rice falls through the grill

Roger was sitting in a very full bus when a fat

Roger was sitting in a very full bus when a fat woman opposite said, “If you were a gentleman, young man, you’d stand up and let someone else sit down.” “And if you were a lady,” replied Roger, “you’d stand up and let four people sit down.”

What’s the speed limit of

What’s the speed limit of sex? 68; at 69 you have to turn around.

Two aliens from outer space landed in Las Vegas

Two aliens from outer space landed in Las Vegas and were wandering around the casinos. One of them volunteered to go inside and see what was happening. He came out looking rather shocked. “What’s the matter?” asked his friend. “It’s a very popular place,” replied the first alien. “It’s full of creatures that keep throwing up little metal discs.”