'Father Christmas has two
| Christmas jokes
'Father Christmas has two reindeer. He calls one Edward and the other one Edward! I bet you can't tell me why he does that! 'Oh, yes I can. the elf said. 'Because tow 'Eds are better than one, of course!
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What has wings, a long tail, and wears a bow?
| Birthday jokes
What has wings, a long tail, and wears a bow? A birthday pheasant!
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Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings,
| Marriage jokes
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
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Q: How is Christmas celebrated in a Jewish
| Ethnic jokes
Q: How is Christmas celebrated in a Jewish home? A: They put parking meters on the roof!
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A woman goes into a funeral home to make
| Dead and dying jokes
A woman goes into a funeral home to make arrangements for her husband's funeral. She tells the director that she wants her husband to be buried in a dark blue suit. He asks, "Wouldn't it just be easier to bury him in the black suit that he's wearing?" But she insists that it must be a blue
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What happens when two burgers fall in love? They live together in holy meatrimony!