BeFunnyNow.com – Page 866

Where do Snowmen go to dance?

Where do Snowmen go to dance? To snowballs.

What steps should you take if you

What steps should you take if you see a dangerous animal on your travels? Very large ones.

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings,

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, “You’re next.” They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

What’s the national anthem of Puerto

What’s the national anthem of Puerto Rico? “Attention K-Mart shoppers…”

A man standing at a bus stop was eating a

A man standing at a bus stop was eating a hamburger. Next to him stood a lady with her little dog, which became very excited at the smell of the man’s supper and began whining and jumping up at him. “Do you mind if I throw him a bit?” said the man to the lady. “Not at all,” she replied, whereupon the man picked the dog up and threw it over a wall.

A ragged individual stranded for several months

A ragged individual stranded for several months on a small desert island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean one day noticed a bottle lying in the sand with a piece of paper in it. Rushing to the bottle, he pulled out the cork and with shaking hands withdrew the message. “Due to lack of maintenance,” he read, “we regretfully have found it necessary to cancel your e-mail account.”