Category: Political jokes

Q: What is the difference between a liberal and a puppy? A: A puppy stops whining after it grows up.

Q: What is the only thing worse than an incompetent liberal President? A: A competent liberal President.

Q: Why do liberals travel in threes? A: One to read, one to write and the other one to keep an eye on both intellectuals.

Q: What’s a conservative? A: A liberal who made it through adolescence.

Q: What is a conservative? A: A liberal who’s been mugged.

It has been said that the United States has the best congressmen money can buy.

A Republican and a Democrat were walking down the street when they came to a homeless person. The Republican gave the homeless person his business card and told him to come to his business for a job. He then took twenty dollars out of his pocket and gave it to the homeless person. The Democrat was very impressed, and when they came to another homeless person, he decided to help. He walked over to the homeless person and gave him directions to the welfare office. He then reached into the Republican’s pocket and gave the homeless person fifty dollars.

Two opposing county chairman were sharing a rare moment together. The Democratic chairman said, “I never pass up a chance to promote the party. For example, whenever I take a cab, I give the driver a sizable tip and say, ‘Vote Democratic. His opponent said, I have a better scheme, and it doesn’t cost me a nickel. I don’t give any tip at all. And when I leave, I also say, ‘Vote Democratic.);

Are you a member of any organized political party? “No. I’m a Republican.”

Q: How many Democrats does it take to destroy a light bulb? A: None. They only know how to destroy the taxpayers.