Category: Doctor and nurse jokes

Doctor, Doctor you’ve taken out my tonsils, my adenoids, my gall bladder, my varicose veins and my appendix, but I still don’t feel well. That’s quite enough out of you!

Doctor Doctor I keep thinking I’m a caterpillar Don’t worry you’ll soon change!

Doctor, Doctor I’ve a split personality Well, you’d better both sit down then!

Doctor, Doctor, some days I feel like a tee-pee and other days I feel like a wig-wam. You’re too tents.

Doctor: You seem to be in excellent health. Your pulse is as regular as clockwork. Patient: That’s because you’ve got your hand on my watch!

Doctor: You seem to be in excellent health. Your pulse is as regular as clockwork. Patient: That’s because you’ve got your hand on my watch!

Doctor, Doctor my sister thinks she is a lift! Well tell her to come in I can’t she doesn’t stop at this floor!

Doctor how can I cure my sleep walking? Sprinkle tin-tacks on your bedroom floor!

Doctor, Doctor I’m becoming invisible. Yes I can see you’re not all there!

Doctor, Doctor I’ve just swallowed a pen Well sit down and write your name!