A minister gave a talk to the Lions Club on sex. When he got home, he couldn’t tell his wife that he had spoken about sex, so he said he had discussed horseback riding with the members. A few days later, she ran into some men at the shopping center and they complimented her on the speech her husband had made. She said, “Yes, I heard. I was surprised about the subject matter, as he’s only tried it twice. The first time he got so sore he could hardly walk, and the second time he fell off.”
Category: Funny jokes – 50 best jokes
What did the egg say to the
What did the egg say to the boiling water? “How can you expect me to get hard so fast? I just got laid a minute ago.”
What’s the speed limit of
What’s the speed limit of sex? 68; at 69 you have to turn around.
I was married 3 times explained
I was married 3 times explained the man to a newly discovered drinking partner, “and I’ll never marry again. My first 2 wives died of eating poison mushrooms and my 3rd wife died of a fractured skull.” “That’s a shame.” said his friend , “How did it happen?” “She wouldn’t eat the mushrooms!”
The officer shouted
The officer shouted orders to a nearby soldier. With considerable bravery, the GI ran directly onto the field of battle, in the line of fire, to retrieve a dispatch case from a dead soldier. In a hail of bullets, he dove back to safety. “Private,” the officer said, “I’m recommending you for a medal. You risked your life to save the locations of our secret warehouses.” “Warehouses?” the private shouted. “I thought you said whorehouses!”
Q: What goes VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM,
Q: What goes VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM, SCREECH? A: A blonde going through a flashing red light.