Have you
| Bus jokes
Have you heard that all the buses and trains are stopping today? No. Is there a strike? No, they're stopping to let the passengers off.
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A woman is walking in the park when she sees a man
| Cat jokes
A woman is walking in the park when she sees a man playing chess with his cat. She says to the man "I can't believe what I'm seeing, a cat that plays chess, what a clever animal!!" The man replied "Nah lady this cats not clever at all I'm beating it 6 games to 1"
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Did you hear about the aristocratic horse?
| Horse jokes
Did you hear about the aristocratic horse? He was the last of his race!
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Doctor, doctor, I'm so ugly. What can I do
| Halloween jokes
Doctor, doctor, I'm so ugly. What can I do about it? Hire yourself out for Halloween parties.
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A boy is about to go on his first date, and is nervous about what to talk about. He asks his father for advice. The father replies: “My son, there are three subjects that always work. These are food, family, and philosophy.” The boy picks up his date and they go to a soda fountain. Ice cream sodas in front of them, they stare at each other for a long time, as the boy’s nervousness builds. He remembers his father’s advice, and chooses the first topic. He asks the girl: “Do you like spinach?” She says “No,” and the silence returns. After a few more uncomfortable minutes, the boy thinks of his father’s suggestion and turns to the second item on the list. He asks, “Do you have a brother?” Again, the girl says “No” and there is silence once again. The boy then plays his last card. He thinks of his father’s advice and asks the girl the following question: “If you had a br other, would he like spinach?”