Category: Clinton jokes

Q: How can you tell Bill Clinton apart from a cow? A: By the wise look in the eyes.

Saddam Hussein calls President Clinton and tells him, “Bill, I had a wonderful dream last night. I could see America, the whole beautiful country, and on each house I saw a banner.” “What did it say on the banners?” Clinton asks. Saddam replies, “Allah is god, god is Allah.” Clinton says, “You know, Saddam, I am really happy you called. Last night I had a similar dream. I could see all of Baghdad, and it was more beautiful than ever. It had been rebuilt completely, and on each house flew an enormous banner.” “What could you see on the banners?” Saddam asks. Clinton replies, “I don’t know. I can’t read Hebrew.”

Q: What is the difference between Dan Quayle, Bill Clinton and Jane Fonda? A: Jane Fonda went to Vietnam.

Q: What’s the difference between Hillary Clinton and a pit bull? A: The pit bull doesn’t carry a briefcase.

Q: How does Bill Clinton say “I’m about to hurt you”? A: “Trust me.”