Bank manager: I'm sorry, sir, you can't open
| Humor jokes
Bank manager: I'm sorry, sir, you can't open an account with this sort of money. They're wooden pieces! Lumberjack: But I only want to open a shavings account.
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Why was the horseman fired from his job of
| Horse jokes
Why was the horseman fired from his job of saddle testing? He was always standing up on the job!
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Denied membership in an exclusive country
| Movie and TV jokes
Denied membership in an exclusive country club because he was an actor, biblical epic star Victor Mature is reported to have said "Hell, I'm no actor, and I've got thirty movies to prove it!"
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Why did the python do national service ?
| Snake jokes
Why did the python do national service ? He was coiled up !
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A little girl spoke to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it is a very large mammal, its throat is very small. The little girl said, “But how can that be? Jonah was swallowed by a whale.” Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human. “It is physically impossible!” she said. Undaunted, the little girl said, “Well, when I get to heaven I will ask Jonah.” To this, the teacher said, “What if Jonah went to hell?”