A man speaks frantically into the phone, “My

Policeman: Why didn't

| Car and train jokes

Policeman: Why didn't you stop at that red light? Motorist: Then you would have caught up with me.

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A person went into the

| Blonde jokes

A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a new blonde girl painting the walls. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket. Thinking this was a little strange, he asked her why she was wearing them rather than old clothes or an overall. She showed him the ins

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A person

| Marriage jokes

A person receives a telegram informing him about his mother-in-law's death. It also enquires whether she should be buried or burnt. He replies, "Don't take chances. Burn the body and bury the ashes."

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If I had

| School jokes

If I had five coconuts and I gave you three, how many would I have left ? I don't know. Why not ? In our school we do all our arithmetic in apples and oranges.

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How does the vicar explore the

| Internet jokes

How does the vicar explore the Internet? With the church mouse.

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A man speaks frantically into the phone, “My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!” “Is this her first child?” the doctor queries. “No, you idiot!” the man shouts. “This is her *husband*!”