Father Murphy walked

Why are pigs such early risers?

| Pig jokes

Why are pigs such early risers? Did you ever try to shut off a rooster?

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A wealthy investor walked into a bank and

| Business jokes

A wealthy investor walked into a bank and said to the bank manager, "I would like to speak with Mr. Reginald Jones, who I understand is a tried and trusted employee of yours." The banker said, "Yes he certainly was trusted. And he will be tried as soon as we catch him."

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Edney and Cole, two Ohio Edison

| Idiot and fool jokes

Edney and Cole, two Ohio Edison electrical repairmen, were working on a blown house circuit. "Hey, Cole!" said Edney. "See those two wires?" "Sure," Cole answered. "Now just grab one of them." Cole grabbed one of the wires. "Feel anything?" asked his partner. "Not a thing," answered Cole. "Goo

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What do pigs do on nice afternoons?

| Pig jokes

What do pigs do on nice afternoons? They go on pignics.

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Patient: Hey, that tooth

| Dentist jokes

Patient: Hey, that tooth you pulled wasn't the one I wanted pulled. Dentist: Relax, I'm coming to it.

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Father Murphy walked into a pub and said to the first Marine he met, “Do you want to go to heaven?” The Marine said, “I do Father.” The priest said, “Leave this pub right now!” He then approached a second Marine. “Do you want to got to heaven?” “Certainly, Father,” was the Marine’s reply. “Then leave this den of Satan!” said the priest. Father Murphy then walked up to an old SgtMaj and asked, “Do you want to go to heaven?” The SgtMaj replied: “No, I don’t Father.” The priest looked him right in the eye and said, “You mean to tell me that when you die you don’t want to go to heaven?” The SgtMaj smiled, “Oh, when I die! Why…yes Father. Shit, I thought you were getting a working party together to go right now!”