The judge said to

Waiter (serving soup): It looks like rain

| Waiter jokes

Waiter (serving soup): It looks like rain today. Patron: Yes it does, but it smells like soup.

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Q: How many Virgos does it take to

| Zodiac jokes

Q: How many Virgos does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Approximately 1.000000 with an error of +/- 1 millionth.

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What did the pay

| Money jokes

What did the pay phone say when the quarter got stuck inside it? Money's tight these days!

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A new man

| Police jokes

A new man is brought into Prison Cell 102. Already there is a long-time resident who looks 100 years old. The new man looks at the old-timer inquiringly. The old-timer says, "Look at me. I'm old and worn out. You'd never believe that I used to live the life of Riley. I wintered on the Riviera,

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A religious man is on top of a roof

| Heaven and hell jokes

A religious man is on top of a roof during a great flood. A man comes by in a boat and says "get in, get in!" The religous man replies, " no I have faith in God, he will grant me a miracle." Later the water is up to his waist and another boat comes by and the guy tells him to get in again. He

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The judge said to his dentist: “Pull my tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth.”