Have you heard about the
| Elephant jokes
Have you heard about the elephant that went on a crash diet ? He wrecked three cars, a bus and two fire engines !
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If I had but one life to give for my country,
| Lawyer jokes
If I had but one life to give for my country, it would be a lawyer's.
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Q. What makes a man think about a candlelight
| Men jokes
Q. What makes a man think about a candlelight dinner? A. A power failure.
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A gang of witches broke into a blood bank last
| Humor jokes
A gang of witches broke into a blood bank last night and stole a thousand pints of blood. Police are still hunting for the clots.
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Seems a guy was driving for hours thu desolate country when he passed a farmhouse, and before he could react, a cat ran out in front of him and*splat*… he flattened the cat. Out of kindness and consideration, he stopped, turned around and drove back to the farmhouse to notify the occupants. When the housewife came to the door, said he, “Pardon memadame, but I just ran over a cat in front of your house, and assumed that it must belong to you. I know this might be hard to hear, but Iwanted to let you know instead of just driving off….” “Not so fast”, says she. “How do you know it was our cat? Could youdescribe him? What does he look like?” The man promptly flopped down on the ground, and said “He looks like thts”as he gave his best shot at a dead cat impression. “Oh no, you *horrible* man”, she replied. “I meant, what did he look like*before* you hit him?” At that, the man got up, covered his eyes with both hands and screamed”Agggghhhhhhhhhh !!!!!!”