A magician was employed by a

What do you get if you cross a cow with an octopus

| Cow jokes

What do you get if you cross a cow with an octopus ? A cow that can milk itself !

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What country do cows love to visit?

| Cow jokes

What country do cows love to visit? Moo Zealand!

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Why did the monster

| Dead and dying jokes

Why did the monster take a dead man for a drive in his car? Because he was a car-case.

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How did cows feel when the branding iron was

| Cow jokes

How did cows feel when the branding iron was invented? They were very impressed!

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How many Obsessive-Compulsive P.D. does

| Mental health jokes

How many Obsessive-Compulsive P.D. does to take to change a lightbulb? Just one. But he has to check it 100 times, one for each watt.

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A magician was employed by a Shipping Line to entertain the passengers during cruises. The captain owned a parrot which always insisted on being part of the acts put on by the magician. He would perch on the edge of the stage and screech, “He does it with a mirror” or “He’s got it up his sleeve.” The magician was furious, but since the bird was a favorite with the captain and he was anxious to retain his position for future cruises, he maintained an angry silence. One evening as the magician worked, the parrot continued to harass the unfortunate man. Sadly the ship ran into a mine which had become detached from the sea floor after a storm. The explosion tore the bow off the ship which sank within a few minutes. Amid the wreckage and the lifeboats, the magician sat on one end of a table from the first class dining room. At the other end sat the parrot, dirty and disheveled, his feathers caked with f uel oil. For some time they eyed each other malevolently saying nothing. Finally the parrot shook himself and advanced across the table. He fixed the magician with a beady eye. “Okay, I give up,” he squawked. “What did you do with the ship?”