One of my husband's duties as a novice drill
| Military jokes
One of my husband's duties as a novice drill instructor at Fort Jackson, S.C., was to escort new recruits to the mess hall. After everyone had made it through the chow line, he sat them down and told them, "There are three rules in this mess hall: Shut up! Eat up! Get up!" Checking to see that
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Camp Doctor: Your cough sounds better
| Doctor and nurse jokes
Camp Doctor: Your cough sounds better today! Camper: It should, I practised all night!
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A defendant was
| Lawyer jokes
A defendant was on trial for murder. There was very strong evidence indicating guilt, but no corpse had been found. In the defense's closing statement the lawyer, knowing that his client would probably be convicted, decided to try a trick. "Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I have a surprise
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Q: How many Italians does it take to change a
| Ethnic jokes
Q: How many Italians does it take to change a lightbulb ? A: Two. One to change it and one to sprinkle it with Parmesan.
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Q . what did the sign on the whore house
| Dirty jokes
Q . what did the sign on the whore house say?A: Beat it we are closed
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One day a boy was drowning in a near by lake. A firefighter swam out and pulled the boy up onto the beach and began CPR. A crowed watched as the firefighter frantically pumped on the boys chest. With great amazement water was pooring from the boys mouth. Each time the firefighter pumped more water came out. A short time later seaweed started coming out, then minnows, then more water started coming out of the boys mouth. The firefighter feared this would never stop. Just then, a paramedic arrived and quickly ran over to the firefighter and b lurted out. “Hey Chief! You better get that kids ass out of the water before you pump that lake dry”.