A man is

Did you hear about the farmer who

| Cow jokes

Did you hear about the farmer who lost control of his tractor in the cow pasture? No! Did he hurt the cows? No, he just grazed them!

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I was married 3 times

| Bar jokes, beer, booze and fun!

I was married 3 times explained the man to a newly discovered drinking partner, "and I'll never marry again. My first 2 wives died of eating poison mushrooms and my 3rd wife died of a fractured skull." "That's a shame." said his friend , "How did it happen?" "She wouldn't eat the mushrooms!"

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Didja hear the news?

| Bar jokes, beer, booze and fun!

Didja hear the news? asked Keenan of his pal at the saloon. "Harrigan drank so much, his wife left him!" "Bartender! Give me six boilermakers!!"

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Which football team loves ice-cream?

| Sport jokes

Which football team loves ice-cream? Aston Vanilla!

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What do you say if you meet a toad ?

| Frog jokes

What do you say if you meet a toad ? Wart's new !

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A man is walking down the street when he hears a voice, “Pssst you come over here!” He looks round and can see no one but an old mangy greyhound. “yes over here!” Said the greyhound “Look at me I’m tied up here, I should be racing I won 14 races in my carrer you know?” The man thought to himself “Oh my god a talking dog, I have to have it, it will make me rich, tv appearances cabaret bookings” So he goes in search of the owner. He found the owner and said “I’d like to buy your dog, is he for sale??” The owner says “No mate you don’t want that old moth eaten thing!” “But I do!” Insisted the man “I’lll give you 1000 pounds for him. “Ok said the owner but I think your making a big mistake!” Handing over the money the man said “Why do you think that?” The man replied “Because that dogs a bloody liar it’s never won a race in it’s life!”