How did the ghost song-and-dance act make a
| Ghost jokes
How did the ghost song-and-dance act make a living? By appearing in television spooktaculars.
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Why do vampires hate arguments?
| Vampire jokes
Why do vampires hate arguments? Because they make themselves cross.
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Why did the footballer hold his
| Sport jokes
Why did the footballer hold his boot to his ear? Because he liked sole music!
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Who made this Christmas pudding?
| Christmas jokes
Who made this Christmas pudding? Our chef. He's a little green man who lives in a toadstool. What did he use to make it? Elf-raising flour, of course.
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How does a barber make phone calls?
| Hair and bald jokes
How does a barber make phone calls? He cuts them short.
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The ninety-year-old man was in for his checkup when the nurse practitioner learned he was about to marry an eighteen year old girl. “Now, Mr. Jenkins,” the nurse practitioner warned, “you should know that when a man your age marries an eighteen-year-old girl, somebody could get hurt.” The old man shrugged, “If she dies, she dies.”