Teacher: Tommy Russell, you're late again.
| Bus jokes
Teacher: Tommy Russell, you're late again. Tommy: Sorry, sir. It's my bus - it's always coming late. Teacher: Well, if it's late again tomorrow, catch an earlier one.
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Q: What do Israeli soldiers do when they get
| Ethnic jokes
Q: What do Israeli soldiers do when they get bored? A: They go over to the West Bank & the Gaza Strip and get stoned.
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Two cannibals just finished a big
| Humor jokes
Two cannibals just finished a big meal and one turns to the other while rubbing his stomach with his fist and says, "You know, I just ate my mother-in-law, and she still doesn't agree with me!"
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When is a letter damp?
| Letter jokes
When is a letter damp? When it has postage due (dew).
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A man asked his wife, "What would you most
| Birthday jokes
A man asked his wife, "What would you most like for your birthday?" She said, "I'd love to be ten again." On the morning of her birthday, he got her up bright and early and they went to a theme park. He put her on every ride in the park - the Death Slide, The Screaming Loop, the Wall of Fea
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Kelly was standing in front of Cohan’s Tavern when he saw a driverless car rolling slowly down the street. He ran to the car, jumped in, and pulled on the emergency brake with a jerk. Kelly got out and very proudly said to the man approaching him, “I stopped it!” “I know, you idiot!” said the man. “I was pushing it!”