You can’t have any more chocolates tonight. It’s

Waiter, I can't eat this

| Waiter jokes

Waiter, I can't eat this meat, it's crawling with maggots ! Quick, run to the other end of the table and grab it as it goes by !

| Christmas jokes

A rabbit's favourite Christmas song? 'Lettuce with a gladsome mind'

| Blonde jokes

Q: Why did the blonde keep a coat hanger in her back seat? A: In case she locks the keys in her car.

| Aviation jokes

I have a friend who is a pilot on a 747. I said "Hi Jack." He shot me.

| Dirty jokes

Q: What do you call two blondes in a canoe? A: Fur traders.

You can’t have any more chocolates tonight. It’s not good for you to go to bed on a full stomach. Oh, Mum. I promise I’ll lay on my side.