An elderly man in Phoenix calls his son in New
| Divorce jokes
An elderly man in Phoenix calls his son in New York and says, "I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough." "Pop, what are you talking about?" the son screams. "We can't stand the sight of each other any longer,"
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Q. What did the cannibal's wife give her
| Cannibal jokes
Q. What did the cannibal's wife give her husband when he came home late for dinner? A. The cold shoulder.
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Q: How many grips does it take to screw in
| Movie and TV jokes
Q: How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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Jimmy, how many more times must I tell you to
| Food jokes
Jimmy, how many more times must I tell you to come away from that cookie tin? No more, mom. It's empty.
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Manager: Our new midfielder cost ten million.
| Sport jokes
Manager: Our new midfielder cost ten million. I call him our wonder player Fan: Why's that? Manager: Everytime he plays I wonder why I bothered to buy him!
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What reads and lives in an apple ? A bookworm !